Why does a woman don’t want sex?

Why does a woman don’t want sex?.

Asking why a woman does not want sex, most men accuse the companion of frigidity. Not understanding the essence of this term and the sexual sexual attraction system, they put a stigma without trying to find a solution. Meanwhile, sexology looks at this problem wider and in this the research of authoritative specialists help us.

Sexologists. Masters and c. Johnson allocated four stages of sexual intercourse. Excitement, friction part, orgasm and resolution.

That is, judging by this scheme, excitation is an integral part and occurs in 100% of cases. Nevertheless, it is here that we observe problems when we are talking about why a woman does not want sex.

Sexual desire as an integral part of sexual intercourse

Only in the mid-70s, Helen Kaplan discovered that a sexual desire determines whether a person will have sex or politely abandon this venture.

Clients who applied for advice persistently assured that excitement did not happen so that the person would not do.

At that time, this was already considered a disorder of intimate life and even there were methods of treatment. Psychologists worked, psychotherapists worked.

But more and more often the woman was recognized as strange and could not help. Well, she does not want, some problems with her, probably strangled.

In the 90s alone, sexologists developed a new diagnostic model and conducted a number of studies, as a result of which it turned out that when analyzing specific situations, no one pays attention to an important detail, the sexual desire that either launches the first phase of sexual intercourse, excitement, or excitement, or excitementBlocks it.

Double control model Eric Jansen and John Bankroft

The central nervous system, regulating human behavior, is based on the principle of starting and inhibition.

This is how aggression works when a surge of emotions and the beginning of action occurs, and then inhibition of the processes. There are quick -tempered people, but unable to “break firewood”. There are people who are unable to stop, they are ready to commit any crimes, and then say that they could not cope with emotions.

Sexual life, as it turned out, originates in the same central nervous system. If there were no conditional gas, there would not have been aroused and sexual attraction.

If there were no conditional brake, then people would have led a random sex life. In our case, the problem is precisely that the blocking mechanisms significantly prevail over the launch mechanisms.

Why does a woman don’t want sex: SES and Sis systems

The sexual arousal system (SES) processes visual, tactile, auditory and olfactory signals in the search for an object for sexual intercourse.

This is done regularly. As soon as one of the objects attracted attention and the central nervous system worked out the signal received, she sends it to the genitals.

The body receives a command to turn on. The girl feels sympathy, the vaginal lubrication occurs, that is, the release of lubrication. She is ready and seems to want to have sex right here and now.

But at this very moment, a system of suppression of sexual excitement is turned on (SIS). Its task is to put forward objections and arrange a counterweight to the system of sexual arousal.

Now the psyche should work out objections and make a decision, after which the woman will either proceed to excitement, or will say no again.

External suppression system

The woman has one gas, but there are two brakes at once. The first is external. This includes the risk of IPPP infection, the unpleasant appearance of the partner, scaring smells, social responsibility, for example, fear of getting a stigma whore. Here we also attribute the risk of getting pregnant. In general, any objective fears.

Internal suppression system

Here we are dealing with beliefs and complexes. Fear of not getting an orgasm, for example. The girl is afraid that she will not enjoy and everything will be in vain.

Or is afraid that the partner will not receive pleasure. Everything that prevents her from relaxing, trusting and enjoying the process.

In this case, the brain will send a signal for suppression and excitement will not occur. The girl will refuse intimacy, being sure that she acted quite correctly.

Why does a woman don’t want sex and how to influence desire?

A woman’s ability to get excited and achieve orgasm is not innate. Although the SES and Sis systems are the other way around. Nevertheless, gaining experience, beliefs and opinions, it forms an idea of sex and builds its behavior based on this. There are sensitive girls, but there are strongly blocked.

Speaking analogies, some build bridges, other walls. If you are wondering why a woman does not want sex, then you should understand this mechanism and the answer will become obvious. Its suppression system works much more actively than the activation system.

First you need to influence the factors of the first system. Love or love, support in relationships, emotional intimacy and high level of trust affect the desire of sex from a woman.

This also includes the external attractiveness of a man, confidence in him, reliability, good health of the girl in a specific period of time.

This explains the disappearance of sex from relations, where many complaints have accumulated between partners and quarrels often occur without an adequate solution to problems. A woman loses confidence in a partner, cannot trust him, loses the ability to relax next to him and, as a result, is not excited, from the word at all.

Further, it’s enough just not to spoil everything. If the behavior of a man does not cause fears, then the suppression system will not work.

If she is afraid to get pregnant, there is a risk that a man will tell everyone and put her in an unpleasant light, thereby hit her reputation, and she also has the feeling that a man simply uses her body, then no sex will be sex.

Why does a woman do not want sex in a relationship and in case of accidental acquaintance

It is quite obvious that there is a difference between a lack of desire in relations and in case of random connections. The process of starting excitation will be the same and here and there. An attractive partner, good mood, beautiful health and a sense of her uniqueness will make her want.

And then depends on the context. In relations, it is necessary to provide support, be able to listen, understand and sympathize, be reliable and true. When the relationship is in the right line, the desire for sex increases greatly.

If this does not happen, you need to solve the accumulated problems and for this it is better to contact a psychologist. Accusing her wife that she is frigid, absolutely pointless.

In case of random connections, you will have to work with its fears. To impress an adequate man who will not run to brag about his little victory to friends, will not tell everyone about how, where and under what circumstances he fucked his companion. She should be sure that this connection will not affect her reputation.

The risks of getting pregnant and an infection transmitted sexually must be left using the condom. The smell is also important.

Healthy and positive men emit pheromones causing attraction. You can’t fake them, but the sense of smell of a gentle sex captures the aroma unmistakable.

Simply put, if a girl who initially showed sympathy eventually refused to continue, should be sought in flaws in her health and behavior. The female system of sexual desire is an extremely complex mechanism and is far from always associated with physiology. Many factors are important.

Sometimes it is possible to meet women who have received religious education and are not able to overcome the belief that sex outside marriage is a sin. Many of them have been going to a sexologist for months to cope with the pathological blocking of their sexuality. They regularly experience the necessary mechanisms, but then braking works and excitement does not occur.

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